You say you didn’t come here to fall in love
But you went ahead and you did anyway
Now the time has come to take hold of yourself
So you close your heart when I beg you to stay
You tell me I’ll get over it soon enough
And I’ll remember you in the far future someday
But I don’t want to forget you now
There’s just got to be another way
You came out of a haunted and twisted past
And you’ve been robbed of your self-respect
You look in the mirror and convince yourself falsely
That you were born with some defect
But look at yourself, you’ll see you were wrong
It was only a delusion all along
‘Cause you’re alive, girl, and it ain’t no sin
To be a part of the world you were born in
Wasn’t your life so much better way back when
You knew how it felt to have someone need you
Remember all the promises we made in the dark
How you cried to me never to leave you
How you cried to me how you were scared to find
That the world will keep going and you’ll be left behind
But now you feel I’m keeping you in a bind
So now you want to leave me behind
You tell me I’m not strong enough
That I don’t have the will to lead
You say that your ship has to sail
So you turn your back when I plead
You claim you’re going places while I’m staying back
Your own show must go on
But I only got one thing to say:
Don’t rush into anything big
Or baby, you’ll be gone
They’re looking for your body, they don’t really care
They’re looking for some cheap thrill when they throw you the stare
They’ll tear you to pieces, they’ll get off on you
Then they’ll throw you out when they get through
But me, I gave you the love that was true
I helped you back up when you were feeling blue
I rode the line of balance just for you
Can’t you see that I needed you
There’s a blank spot in my mind where you used to be
And I feel all empty inside
It’s time for me to put you out of my memory
It’s no longer time to hide
‘Cause you robbed me of all my confidence
You left me groping around in the black
You took away my personality
And it took me three months to get it back
I’m not begging you to come back
In fact, I don’t even think I want it
But there’s the ghost of your past love for me
That keeps my sleepless nights haunted
I told you all I could, all that I felt
And you didn’t want to hear
You turned your back and walked away
And you didn’t shed a tear
You said you only wanted to be good friends
But there’s a well-known saying that’s not hard to comprehend
Two full-time lovers decide to be good friends
Don’t you know that’s the beginning of the end
Are you still sleeping lonely
Once you’ve turned off your light?
Do you know that I’m wandering
Through the middle of the night?
The show is long past over
They crowd, they’ve all gone home
It’s just me and I’m crying
Since you left me all alone
It’s three in the morning
And I’m staggering through the city
The wall that I have built up
Gives way to self-pity
I’m thinking of you all curled up
In the arms of your latest lover
Leaving me to stagnate
And roll into the gutter
When the morning comes and the tears have dried
I take my depression and pull it inside
‘Cause it’s either cut it loose, babe, or fall and drown
Cut it loose or let it drag me down
Don’t ask me no questions or look too long in my face
‘Cause when I turn my back, you’ll disappear without a trace
And you’ll go on with your life and realize your mistake
But I’ll be nowhere to be found ‘cause I’d have made my break
If your purpose in life is to sleep around
Then go ahead and do it
My mission on Earth is to play good music
Now I’ve got the chance and I won’t lose it
If you thought I was your only hope
Well, you threw it out, you blew it
It’s all part of breaking away
If you think the matter’s open to discuss
If you think it’s never too late for us
You’ll only be chasing a missed bus
It’s all part of breaking away
©2023 The Hesh Inc.
This song is the first of my heartbreak epics, written in 1984 as the relationship I had with my Girlfriend From Hell™ was falling apart and crumbling to the ground. I had come into town the evening of Israel's Independence Day thinking I'd spend it with her, which didn't happen (read between the lines there). It was the only time, really, when I had nowhere to go at night and I just wandered through the city by myself, long after the festive crowds were safely tucked away in bed, till dawn began to break and I could make my way to the bus station and catch the first ride home. I was a real emotional wreck after the whole thing ended but I was able to put all the angst into this song, which is a real pounding piano power ballad. Never recorded or performed, but rehearsed many, many times, and will be included in my projected album of piano-power-pop songs that I intend to record once the Soul In Exile thing will have been finished.