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Daily Lyric: LIMO BLUES

Cheap black suit and cheesy tie

A Lincoln Continental I could never buy

Collapsing dress shoes and standard shades

A bagful of maps and tools of the trade

Ain’t got no spare, ain’t got no jack

Black vinyl matron spread out in the back

With face like an ostrich and demeanor of a hen

She don’t like my vibe, she’ll never use me again

And the wipers are scraping out a rhythm

Turning diamonds into smears on my windshield

Doing nothing to improve my vision

As I’ve been blinded since I left that rosy field

And I’m cruising through the swampy stoned summer

Of a northeastern megalopolis heartbreak night

Armed with a thesaurus

Three verses and a chorus

Just another turnkey turkey behind a pair of headlights.

Slunkatelic, slumpadelic, leaning over the wheel

Coaxing a ton of aging automobile

From Dead Bank and Ocean Grave all the way to Warkyland

JFK, LGA, like the back of my hand

Well I’ve been haunting the highways like the

ghost of Tom’s wraith

Since the contract ran out and you ran out of faith

Right back to square one, starting from scratch

Squeezing more measly rides from dispatch

And there’s dandruff on my windshield,

flakes from heaven

How the hell did I get from May to December

Fueled by heartattack in a cup from 7-Eleven

Coughing up things I’d rather not remember

I’m not content to be another slow rider

in the fast lane

Through this classic South Jersey churnpike landscape

Collecting my ramblings

Through meanderings and amblings

Just another turnkey turkey dreaming of escape.

And I watch the signs …

NY and north, PA and south, Del Mem Br

GS Pkwy, NJ Tpke, Outerb Cr

Keep awake, take a safety break

Keep left for Cheesequake

Next service area, 13 miles.

Southbound slowdown, stoking the stress

Headache and heartbreak, hammering my chest

Agonizing and theorizing, through the stop and go

Illuminated by the dashboard’s phosphorescent glow

Disabled vehicles parked on grass, awaiting patrol

And I scramble through my pockets for change

to pay the toll

One finger on the wheel, narrowly averting a crash

But it’s no use, this driver carries no cash

And there’s no diamond on my windshield

I get no TLC from the T&LC

And when I try to merge, no one yields

Once I get shooed from my spot by the PAPD

Maneuver and jockey, a round of toll plaza hockey

Among all the tunnel trucks down on their luck

Overpaying my dues

With these limousine blues

Just another turnkey turkey hustling for a buck.

And I keep watching the signs …

Holland Tun, Lincoln Tun, Geo Wash Br

Coney Is Ave, Cr Bx Expwy, FDR Dr

Express and local lanes, heavy merge ahead

Next crossover to express lanes, 22 miles

Reduce speed ahead, stop here on red

It’s thru traffic, churnpike ends 130 miles.

©2023 The Hesh Inc.

"Limo Blues" - original Ai art by The Hesh Inc.
Overpaying my dues, with these limousine blues / Just another turnkey turkey hustling for a buck.

Another one from my limo driving days. It's all true. I was going to make a whole album about that miserable time in my life, my "season in hell" really, mostly because songs that are born of agitation or pain are much more heartfelt and relatable than happy-go-lucky songs. But when I reread these lyrics I can feel that hammering in my chest that's mentioned in the third verse and I realize that living in the muck and mire of the past does not allow me to move into the future or even the present. All told, though, I love the wordplay, and perhaps this song will find its way onto an album I'm contemplating about the displacement I felt for much of my adult life.


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